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Study shows parents aren't tuned into teens' stress levels

by Christine Kim
Tuesday, December 15, 2009

ANCHORAGE, Alaska -- Numbers show that parents aren't aware how stressed their teens are.

Experts say stress is a top health concern for adolescents and a trigger to dangerous behavior.

Local psychologists say there are warning signs among teens that show the stress they have is too much to handle.

It was just over a week ago when police say one 16-year-old high school student stabbed his ex-girlfriend 29 times.

It left schools, staff and students dealing with the aftermath.

"Frequently after a situation like this or a crisis, kids need to get together to talk about what's happened—close friends, kids who knew the student who died or the student involved in the crisis situation. They need to get together. They can't concentrate on school," said school district psychologist Mary DuHoux.

DuHoux and Erik Viste were part of the crisis response team-- six psychologists provided services to students the day after the stabbing.

"We identified who the student is or students that were involved in the situation and we identify proximity of friends, how long they've been in the building and we pay attention to those different population groups but we are there for students who need to be referred or asks for somebody," Viste said.

Professional counselor Christine Sam says adolescents have the most difficulty coping with stress.

"Adolescents tend to be more impulsive, they tend to push more on the edge of what's possible, of what's acceptable. So when you have a kid that's extremely stressed out with no coping mechanisms that are effective, you can have some very tragic situations happen," Sam said.

Before a tragic incident occurs, Sam says there are warning signs that show something may be wrong.

She says changes in sleeping and eating habits; complaints about headaches, stomach aches or muscle aches with no cause and changes in mood or behavior are all indicators.

"Any number of variables that cause kids to feel stressed. Kids generally feel and the reality is that they have a lot less control over their lives than adults do," Sam said.

In a 2009 American Psychological Association survey 45 percent of teens ages 13-17 say they're more stressed this year, but only 28 percent of parents think so.

And 28 percent of teens think their stress is extreme compared to 2-5 percent of parents.

"Sometimes as adults we can tend to downplay our children's response to situations and sort of go, ‘Ahh, 10 years from now you'll be laughing at this.' Well that's not a helpful response," Sam said.

Psychologists say it's important to open up a path of communication.

"It's really critical for them to process the information but then to also move on," Sam said.

Sam says coping with stress is a prevention mechanism to block what you can from happening when you have the chance. 

Psychologists say it's not just the parents of teens who should look out for signs of stress.

It can also be teachers, coaches, siblings and other family members.

For adolescents who are stressed, one counselor recommends that they should be provided with a supportive network of family and friends.

A counselor, therapist or even clergy member can also be an option for the teen to cope with stress. 

Contact Christine Kim at ckim@ktuu.com