Halfway woman won't let illness keep her from being mom

Melinda Malott is juggling another busy day.

She dispenses hugs and kisses as her children head off to school, makes her weekly grocery list, pays the bills, buys gifts for upcoming birthday parties and baby showers and organizes a fundraiser to send her daughter to Europe for a student leader ambassador program.

It's the kind of routine that's all too familiar to most busy moms.

But Malott's itinerary is all the more remarkable in light of the fact that she is largely homebound, debilitated by chronic fatigue syndrome.

Instead of planning ahead, Malott takes one day at a time.

There are limitations on how often she can leave the house — and some weeks she doesn't go out at all.

She seldom drives, and she  relies on others to take her to appointments.

Rain, cold and extremes in temperatures worsen her symptoms, as do lights, noise, smells and motion.

Visiting with people and taking phone calls can be exhausting.

And with every activity — "preparing meals, ironing a shirt, putzing around the house" — she has to pace herself.

"I have to break down tasks little by little," Malott said. "What I can do today, I might not be able to do tomorrow."

Chronic fatigue syndrome, also known as myalgic encephalopathy, is a devastating and little-understood disorder, characterized by an overwhelming lack of energy and a variety of other symptoms, including muscle pain, memory problems, swollen lymph nodes, sore throat, achy joints and unrestful sleep.

Malott, 49, has been living with the disorder for more than five years.

She has had to give up a 28-year nursing career, can no longer work out at the gym and now attends church from her red leather recliner at home, via the Internet.

But that hasn't stopped her from being the best mother she can be to her children, Sara, 9 and Luke, 7.

And it doesn't diminish her capacity to give and receive love.

"Before the illness, I was a very active mom. I would run through the door, start supper, round up the children for baths, run here, run there. Parenting was more of a task-based role," Malott shared. "Now, it's more emotional, supportive and educational."

Malott said she "didn't see this right away, but there are some gifts in this for my kids. Their mom is home every morning and every evening when they come home, without fail. They will have a heart for people with illness and disability and they will benefit from the fact that I have greatly increased my efforts to educate them about life's lessons and not taking anything for granted."

Malott married her husband Jason when she was 38 and had her daughter Sara when she was 39, followed by a son, Luke.