By RICHARD RYAN
9:56 PM AKDT, October 18, 2012
She said we should probably take the house off the market now that the weather was cooling and wasn’t it great that we lived in Imperial Valley and how lucky we were that no one bought it in August (there was one sale in El Centro to an air conditioner repair man who paid cash). I agreed. Warm, sunny days, cool nights, but not so cool that the kids can trick or treat without the Styrofoam cooler for the bite size Milky Ways.
We’ve just seen neighbors who we thought moved in June. They’ve been huddled around their thermostats and punching Mike Hardaway’s number on speed dial.
But that lava-like terror, those roasty toasty days are long forgotten. A dim memory in our smoldering brain cells now just beginning to cool off. Neighbors are jubilant, even crazed, holding spontaneous block parties centered around piñatas of Frosty the Snowman. The piñatas are filled with rock salt just in case it’s needed for those soon to be icy driveways. Oh, brother, October is here. I imagine snowflakes, a frosty topping on Mount Signal. There was snow in the Valley in the 1930s. It will happen again, and there are reports that it’ll be an El Niño winter. Who knows? That rock salt may come in handy (there are people out there wondering, “rock salt,” like, “big rock candy mountain?”). No, silly. Rock salt is used to make the shaved ice in raspados easier to shave.
October, the month of Oktoberfest and Halloween, Chargers fans ripping at their jerseys in predictable frustration. Yankees choking. World Series baseball games being pre-empted by Jersey Shore TV, and the start of nude off-roading in the sand dunes. The sand in the nooks and crannies is really worse than the sunburns, reports ranger Rick of the El Centro Bureau of Land Management. Did I mention Columbus Day for the Italians out there? Columbus is not much in fashion these days despite the fact that he brought the first pepperoni pizza to the New World. It says so in Wikipedia.
But I digress. Burn the windshield sun shades. Pour all that sun block into the New River. Donate your sunglasses to the Lions. Ladies, stop walking down Main Street holding an umbrella to protect from the sun’s former cruel rays. Cooler days are upon us. Motel 6 is filling up with out-of-town visitors whose cars did not overheat on Interstate 8. They have arrived because the weather is now nice. Costco is selling down jackets for cheap. Ruben’s raspados’ business is chillin’, and friends are unpacking their sweatshirts and pants from mini storage. Lordy, take down that “for sale” sign and be thankful to live in the Imperial Valley. We are no longer an intense red dot on the USA Today weather map. Kinda orange. Highs in the 90s but lows in the 60s.
Richard Ryan is an El Centro resident.
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